Get real about emotions

Published: Sep 29 , 2014
Author: Gaetan Pellerin

We’ve all been trained to hide our emotions in a business environment—especially during negotiation. Keep your emotions out of negotiations or the other side may crush you, right? Not exactly, because you can’t negotiate effectively as a detached robot. So how do you find the happy medium?

 Recognize that emotions—positive and negative—are totally normal during a negotiation. But we’re often so busy driving the conversation, persuading the other party and doing everything we can to close the deal, that in the moment, we lose touch with our emotions. Or we choose not to deal with them.

 This can affect you whether you’re a seller or buyer. As a seller, you may have worked hard to prepare a complex proposal, which you believe is a win-win for both parties. But when you present it, those on the other side aren’t happy. Not only do they reject your proposal, they threaten to give the business to your competitor. Or, as a client, you’re told by the only vendor who carries your product line or can solve your problem that the price being offered is final, so “Take it or leave it.”

 In both cases, whether seller or buyer, you feel victimized, insulted and betrayed and fear losing the deal and not achieving your goal. The muscles in your chest tighten, your anxiety rises and you feel like blurting out an angry, “You’ve got to be kidding me!” or “You can’t do that!”  But you’re professional enough to avoid such a counterproductive outburst. Yet you can’t simply dismiss these all-too-real emotions.

 At this point in the negotiation, take a step back to acknowledge your emotions and analyze where they’re coming from. Once you understand them, you have two choices: Ignore the emotions and try to continue the same way. Or, be curious. Try to connect with the other person to understand his or her point of view with a question such as, “Help me to understand how you arrived at this conclusion.”

 Remember that in a heated negotiation, controlling and harnessing emotions is never easy. Still, the more you’re able to acknowledge these emotions as they arise, the greater your likelihood of achieving the desired outcomes.

Gaetan Pellerin


SHARE

blogAuthor

About the author:

Gaetan Pellerin
No bio is currently avaliable

Latest Blog:

It's All in the Timing

Tommy Cooper was one of the funniest comedians ever. How do I know? Well partly because he has 13 of the best jokes in the top 50 gags of all time. A personal favourite being, “heard the one about two aerials meeting on a roof, falling in love, and getting married? The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant”. Telling a good joke is not just about the content. It is also in the timing of the delivery. The same could also be said about negotiation. Picking your time to enter into a negotiation can have a significant impact on its progression and your outcome.

Latest Tweet:





United States
973.428.1991
usa@scotwork.com
Follow us
cpd.png
voty2016_sign_gold.png